April 16th, 2017

Sleepy beauty

 Last night I took half pill, not the same than the night before, and I fell asleep at 1.30am. I woke up today 6.30am, I don't know why, then fell asleep again until 11.30am.
I forced myself to get up, I need clean the house and work in a design. I want cook the lunch for tomorrow, get a good shower, and put my brain to work more and more. I will try to not drink 5 cup of coffee today to can sleep earlier and tomorrow don't be a zombie during the day. 

I didn't feel hungry this weekend, I had just 1 meal per day. Not sure if I lose more weight but my belly is very very flat  Anyway I'll start to eat more fruits and vegetals because I want to start my workout again. The problem is I don't know what to do about the pills. I really don't let my mind relax, I overcharge my mind with a lot of task and I don't want to stop it. Is like a drug to see all that my mind can do, can fix, can learn that I wish we don't need to sleep to can stay all day long pushing my mind beyond its limits. The problem is that my body, that stupid container wich we have to carry, get tired... and when my body is tired it fuck my mind. I got depressed then my mind enters in a negative state. Pills help to avoid that negative state but some pills makes my brain stupid, indifferent to everything, and that's not good at all. Other pills make my body tired, then I couldn't do my workout. I really don't like using pills and that's why I just take it when the negative state is ver important. 
I won't test with ilegal drugs, no way. 2 years ago I changed some negative communication that I had with my mind using basic Neuro-linguistic programming. Maybe if I learn more about this I could eradicate any negative thought for ever. 


 As I wanted, I cleaned the house... it make me so happy. After a shooting shower I've written an email to my client to show and explain all that I did in the website. I hope, wish, pray he likes it. 

Something that I LOVE about being independent is that I don't need to go to anywhere for days like Easter. My mom and sister were in their department, 4 floor upstair, but there wasn't need to go to share lunch or spend time together. I'm not the kind of person who go forced to meetings then run back home to write shit in my journal. I'm in this way since always, even when I was married. Sometimes I just didn't feel sharing a day with my or his family, then I stayed at home and nobody feel offended. 

So, today, the last day of my 3 days off, I had a good day. Everything is clean, I'm cooking a salad with many vegetals for tomorrow, and now I'm ready to start another design. I won't have dinner because for lunch I ate pizza then I don't feel hungry. Maybe I will have yogurt and fruits, or coffee.

I've to do my nails. The last nailpolish I used is awesome. I love the color, and how long it stay on my nails. I bought it on Walmart and I'm sure it cost less than 2 usd. The color is lovely, even Mike likes so much this pink.


Maybe I should do a list with nailpolish to remember wich colors I like and wich brands are good/bad.

Btw... I got some chocolate eggs... people wants me fat!!! Every Easter is the same... I got so much chocolate that I have for the whole week 

Ferrero Rocher egg

Handmade egg


 The client answered my mail. He says I'm doing very well and he's happy to see I understand what he wants. He see I take care of many details that he hasn't even think. He likes the website and soon he will send me the info that I asked to end the work. He said: excelent work! 

I'm so happy!!!