Last night I went to bed and I felt something I have never felt before. My heart did 1 beat in a way I have never felt. It was like if something pushed my heart out of me, I don't know how to describe it in a best way. It was not arritmia, it was not like anything I felt before. That beat hurted because it was strong and violent. And after it I could not feel my heart beating again, but it was for sure because I was still breathing (and I am!).
I put my hand on my chest and still could not feel its beats. Then I check my bpm. I had to check it twice to be sure it was not wrong. I had just 42 bpm and i think this is the lower I registry since I check my bradicardia. I didnt feel in this way before, it was not like other times when I feel stressed nor tired, or when I took pills, it was different and freak me out to feel my body working so slowly, so down, like if it will stop anytime.
It's been a year since I moved to this house and although it's little I really enjoy more this one than the older apartment I lived. The neighbors in this building doesnt botter me, the only one I used to hear while they having sex it seems they moved the bed away from the wall, or maybe they stopped having sex, or they moved to another house, I do not care really. The only one I hate is the people who live next to the building because at weekend they usually listen to music (crap music) very loudy.
Everything is new so nothing has been broken and it is very easy to clean the house, so I can't complain. Moving to this house was really a fresh start in my life. I changed a lot of things, no more stress, no more anxiety, depression is gone at least for now, I'm having very healthy life and habits, I'm getting many goals, and I got confidence. A lot of things in just 1 year!
I am thinking about to buy my own apartment so maybe next year I will start to see how much money they cost and what papers I need for it.
Ok I think that I finally understand how this journal and the circles work lol. I feel a little dumb but just now I realized that for can read someone I just need to subscribe instead give acces. I got it!! Btw I was looking for people from my country to see if they use diaries and I realize that they not, just one active person. I also looked for people from countries around and nothing, there are many people with journals but inactive.
I think they like using Facebook which I do not like so much.
I didnt write my weekly summary yesterday but it was ok. I improved some my sleeping and my heathing, and I keep my activity level. I am still losing weight, slowly because really there is not much left to lose, and I continue burning fat from my hips and waist.
I did 2 weeks of this diet so I have 2 weeks left to finish it. Last weekend I got a little bored with the food and I miss drinking coffee but I wont fuck the diet up right now when I did half way. in 2 weeks I will rest some days and see how my body react and then I will repeat the diet if I start going up in weight.